Tag Archives: kids

How Many Kids Should You Have Over for a Playdate?

My kids love to go play with friends or have them come over to our house. The way so many parents are protective, most often they have to go to their friends’ houses rather than invite them over, which is frustrating, but that’s the way it goes.

But why do so many parents insist on their kids just having one friend over at a time? I’d rather invite a crowd!

There’s nothing wrong with some one on one playtime, but there’s a lot to be said for having several friends over at once. Better games of tag or hide and go seek, for starters.

“Sorry, they already have a friend over.”

The kids also learn more about dealing with each other in a group. How do you keep from leaving anyone out of the fun? How can you all agree on what to do, more or less?

I can’t tell you how often my kids have asked if a friend can play, only to be told, “Sorry, they already have a friend over.”

I know having several friends over is harder on the parents. I do get that. It’s more chances for arguments and hurt feelings.

These things are a natural part of childhood. Headache they may be, but you don’t need to mediate every little disagreement. Make sure it doesn’t get out of hand, and you’re doing plenty.

If feeding the kids is an issue, talk to the other parents. If you take turns having groups of kids over, you aren’t going to be getting hit too badly by the quantity of snacks consumed overall.

Best of all, once you can trust the kids, there’s safety in numbers. You can let a group of kids play out front or go to the park together once they’re old enough and responsible enough. A group of kids is very safe so long as the neighborhood itself isn’t dangerous, and most aren’t.

Yes, you’re going to want to know enough about your child’s friends and their parents to know you can trust them. Yes, there may be some of the negative effects of peer pressure.

Kids need these challenges as they grow up. It helps them to deal with the greater challenges they’ll deal with as adults.

Besides, if you get known as the mom who lets all the friends come over, you’ll know where your own kids are more often. As they get older, it may not always be going outside to play, but that’s okay. It’s just another way to keep up with your children’s lives and to know more about their friends. Personally, I like that idea!

How to Choose Eco Friendly Children’s Toys

Children in the United States as a general rule have a lot of toys. I mean a lot. Often more than they can realistically play with. By the time you add in all they toys that you as parents choose for them, that grandparents provide, toys from other relatives, plus from friends at birthday parties, you’re talking quite a number of toys. How on earth are you supposed to keep that even remotely eco friendly?

It’s not easy. But with a little discussion with family and friends, and some good choices on your own, you can do it.

Start When They’re Young

It’s never too soon to start thinking of how eco friendly your children’s toys are. It’s even more important in many ways that you pick eco friendly toys for your baby than it is for your older kids. Who’s more likely to regularly put toys in their mouth, after all?

Buy and encourage others to buy toys that are free of phthalates if they must buy plastic. Be open about your preference for wooden and organic toys. If you’re clear about what you’d like to have in your home, many people will listen. There’s only so much you can do about the ones who won’t listen.

When it comes to painted toys and jewelry, you’re going to have to think about what’s in that paint too. Standards have gotten stricter for lead content in paint, but cadmium is also an issue.

Encourage Toy Trades

If you have family or friends with kids just a bit older, younger or right around the ages of your children, talk about handing down or trading toys. It’s a great way to keep kids using toys while giving them a fresh assortment regularly.

This can be challenging as kids get very attached to certain toys. If you’re doing a trade, beware of kids getting too attached to a toy that you had planned on trading back or to another child. Expect that trading and handing down will work better with some toys than with others.

If you can get this started when the kids are young, they are likely to be more matter of fact about handing down toys that they’re bored with. If they’ve never had to do it but you’re suddenly insisting, of course you’ll face resistance.

Buy Used Toys

There are many resources to buy used toys. Craigslist, thrift stores, garage sales and eBay are wonderful for getting toys relatively cheaply, and you can’t forget Freecycle for freebies. I bought my kids an old Atari 2600 so that they could play video games, and they’re quite happy with it. No need for a modern system, and the cartridges are really cheap, especially in comparison to more modern gaming systems. Yet the games are highly engaging and loads of fun for the kids and for us.

All kinds of toys and games can be acquired used. You will want to be aware of any potential recalls or safety issues.

And when your kids are done with them, you can sell the toys off too if they’ve lasted.

The Plain Cardboard Box

When you’re thinking eco friendly toys, you cannot forget the plain cardboard box. You may get one when you buy a new appliance or you may have to go to Home Depot to ask them to save a box for you to pick up the next day for your kids. However you manage it, a cardboard box can be made into a great playhouse.

Don’t Forget Outdoor Toys

Some of the best toys you can get for your kids will be the ones that encourage them to play outside. Kids need to get outdoors more than many do these days. Skates, bicycles, scooters, balls and so forth at appropriate ages encourage a lot of activity. Don’t forget shovels for encouraging them to help you in the garden.

You can also take the time to teach your kids to play classic childhood games that don’t require any accessories. Think about tag and hide and go seek. Outdoor play doesn’t need to revolve around a toy at all.

When Should You Teach Your Child to Swim?

Summer is coming and that means your family might be spending some time near the water, whether it’s a swimming pool, a river, the ocean, a lake, whatever’s convenient to you.

Are your children good swimmers yet?

Swimming is something I consider to be a vital skill for children even if you and everyone in your family does not have a swimming pool available. Just because you don’t have easy access now doesn’t mean your kids never will, and it’s good for them to be able to cope if they get a chance to go swimming.

How Young is Too Young for Swimming Lessons?

I’m all for teaching kids of any age to swim. I don’t believe there’s such a thing as too young. And it would appear that National Institutes of Health agrees with me. Despite fears that swimming lessons for very young children (ages 1-4) increases the odds of drowning, a study has shown that this isn’t the case.

With a very active toddler and inlaws with a backyard swimming pool, you have no idea how comforting this is to me. Sweet little rascal is going to learn to swim as soon as possible.

It’s important to keep in mind that swimming lessons don’t guarantee your child won’t ever drown. In fact, the NIH report found that many of the older kids who drowned were in fact fairly skilled swimmers. Swimming lessons still appeared to help limit drownings, but they were not a guarantee.

Always Be Vigilant Near Water

It doesn’t matter how well your kids swim, you should always be careful when your family is around a body of water that someone could drown in. Younger kids should have one adult whose sole responsibility is to know where that child is and what he or she is doing at all times.

No leaving the area without assigning another responsible adult to keep watch.

You’ll still need someone watching older kids, as accidents can happen. Kids who are confident in the water are likely to enjoy some horseplay or test their limits.

My oldest tests her limits all the time when we go swimming. Sometimes she needs a little help.

Use Proper Water Safety Gear

This is one area where I’ve had to disagree with my inlaws a few times. They always want my kids to wear floaties on their arms.

These are a really bad idea.

Floaties give kids who can’t swim the idea that they’ll be just fine in the water. They don’t realize how much they’re relying on them.

Worse, floaties can come off with little warning. Kid arms are often skinny things, and the floaties just don’t stay on that well when the kids get to playing a little rough.

I’ve been told that they also teach bad swimming habits. I’ve talked to swim instructors who really hate floaties.

If you need to put your child in something to help him or her stay afloat in the water, use proper floatation gear such as a life vest. These still present the problem of letting a child who can’t swim feel more comfortable in the water, but a properly fitting life vest isn’t going to just pop off. They’re much safer, but don’t relax your vigilance.

Know How to Swim Yourself

If you can’t swim, there’s only so much you can do if one of your kids needs help in the water. And if you can swim, make sure to take the time to build up your endurance. Even a small child is very hard to carry through the water when you have to swim. After all, both of you need your heads out of the water regularly, possibly constantly if the child is not comfortable holding his or her breath underwater.

Take some time throughout the swimming season and build up your swimming skills. It’s great exercise and has a shot at being a benefit to your family. Hopefully by just making it so that your kids can have a little more fun in the water, but it’s nice to have a shot at being able to help someone struggling.

CPR lessons are a good idea too. CPR is one of those skills you hope you never need, but if it comes up necessary you’ll be extremely grateful you took the time to learn it.

Wanna Go Camping?

I got an email today from the National Wildlife Federation about the upcoming Great American Backyard Campout on Saturday, June 26, 2010. I think the name just about says it all.

The timing quite amused me. My husband was going to take our older two camping in the backyard this weekend, but changed his mind when he realized the temperatures were going to be in the high 30s to low 40s F all night. The baby and I weren’t going to do it because I have enough trouble getting her to sleep as things stand. Something about camping out with a baby who is teething molars really didn’t appeal to me. Not with a bed at hand.

The goal is to encourage kids to get outside more. So many kids these days spend very little time outside. They’d rather watch TV or play on the computer or with video games. They’re missing out on the amazing things they could be seeing outside.

If you register for the Campout, the site will provide you with recipes, information on nocturnal wildlife, plus songs, games and activities you can do.

You don’t have to stick to your backyard if you’d rather camp elsewhere, of course. Just get out and camp for at least that night!

There’s a lot to be said about getting kids outside. It helps them be more creative, helps them be healthier, and even helps in academic performance. Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children From Nature-Deficit Disorder is a great pick if you want to learn more about why kids need to get outside more.

I’m pretty sure we’ll be doing this. I can’t imagine my husband declining the chance to camp. Anyone else?

Encourage Your Kids to Do Science Experiments

One of the greatest skills I think you can give your children is the ability to explore the world around them. That means letting them play outside as well as encouraging them to experiment with science.

Experiments are a lot more fun way to learn science than what most schools teach too. Great for showing your children that science can be fun, not just equations and numbers.

I’m always on the lookout for great science books for my kids. I just came across The Book of Totally Irresponsible Science: 64 Daring Experiments for Young Scientists on Amazon, and it looks like loads of fun. Nature in a Nutshell for Kids: Over 100 Activities You Can Do in Ten Minutes or Less looks good too, and even comes in a Kindle edition if you prefer.

While not every science experiment is great for the environment many can be, and an understanding of science is a real benefit to children as they grow up. It will help them to understand more of the concerns about what we’ve done to our environment and to understand when you disagree with the naysayers.

Don’t forget that you can include science even in your nature walks. Pick up fallen leaves and talk about their parts and what they do for the trees. Discuss the different kinds of rocks you find. Talk about how the different animals you spot live.

Make science fun and interesting and you’ll give your children a lifelong benefit. They don’t have to become scientists, but a basic understanding of the principles is a good thing.